* Note: This post is a touch of fun with a (not extremely) unpretentious message woven through it. It’s not planned to be a serious piece of news coverage, it’s no self-awareness diamond and it’s unquestionably no logical survey of the craft of writing for a blog. I totally recognize that I am a fledgling blogger… however, even fledglings can mention objective facts and have feelings. For my non-Australian companions it’s most likely relevant for me to impart to you that numerous Aussies are given to visit episodes of facetious correspondence.
This article is the very thing we would conversationally call, a piss-take.
So I’ve been living in the blogosphere pretty decidedly for a couple of months at this point; obviously still a fledgling with much to advance however… I continue to run over this measurement:
“There are 55 million blog locales”.
Presently, in fact, I’ve just surveyed 54 million of them however I think after much investigation and quality examination, I’ve un-earthed a large number of the mysteries of making a genuinely poo site.
You don’t get this kind of valuable data consistently so you best print it out, feature the various great pieces and put it on the ice chest (where all important data is kept). Regardless of whether you’re not a blogger right now, document this in your truly significant stuff record since when you choose to foster your own poop blog, this will give the edge; a running beginning.
An out of line advantage.
Consider it an ergogenic (execution-improving) post.
Here we go; pens primed and ready.
Stage One
Continuously utilize mathematical titles for your posts like:
“Ten stages to…….”
“The main seven reasons for….”
“Eight motivations to …..”
“100 different ways to….”
Titles like this show the peruser that 1) you know bunches of stuff (vital) and 2) you can count (never trust individuals who can’t count).
Stage Two
Stay away from unique substance and thought, no matter what.
Assuming you in all actuality do have a unique thought for your blog… disregard it.
Consistently take from others, change a couple of words and consider it your own.
See what most different bloggers are doing…. also, do that.
For what reason be a pioneer when you can be an imitator?
Stage Three
Call your blog something strange, uncertain, puzzling, and sort of … idiotic.
Frightening even.
That way perusers will be so occupied and confounded your ludicrous blog name that they won’t see the poo content on your website.
Stage Four
Most certainly don’t have a place of distinction for your site.
Give your all to make it indistinct from the wide range of various poop.
In the event that is conceivable, make it look and sound like all the others.
Stage Five
Face no challenges.
Be protected.
Try not to have an assessment.
Try not to get off the wall and certainly don’t put anybody in a terrible mood.
Try not to be dubious and totally don’t contradict any of the specialists.
As opposed to expounding on what you energetically have faith in, undermine your norms and values consistently and expound on anything that individuals will peruse.
